BookFest, and the Hideous Coat Convention

Today I am excited beyond belief . The day I've been waiting for ....the Hexham Book Festival is here Hexham Book Festival or at least I assume its in hexham and I too shall be there in a few hours , after I have finished revelling in these last few anticipatory moments , and cleaned the porch floor ( I had almost forgotten about mopping floors so little rain have we had these last few weeks ) and decided what to wear .
Nat refuses to allow me to leave the house in my old beige linen -belt- up- and -go mac ( gifted to me second hand by my sister's employer some years ago ) and when I asked her to explain why on my return from the Coffin Car expedition when my friend Deb had complimented me on its stylishness .
Nat rather too willingly took me in hand in front of the mirror and showed me the reason .
Look Mother , she said . Its pointless reducing from a , what is this coat , here , a size fourteen , to whatever you are now , a ten maybe , and dressing yourself in the same shapeless old garments , so that you look like a Sack . Its time to Move On .
So , duly , she took me to town and insisted I buy a black mac , in a size ten , and very nice too ( ish ) , but on Thursday when I washed it ( in preparation for Literary Fest and Mother and Daughter Bonding Pizza of Friday Night ) Something Wierd happened and it shrunk out of its seams and when I placed it on the ironing board , not a thing I am terribly familiar with , the words shapeless , hopeless and dishrag sprang to mind . So back to the department store I headed , ( sans receipt of course ) but with arguments mustered , and explained my predicament . Yes , according to the instructions . No , no special instruction on the chart about ironing or drying ( she got her specs on to check , as I had done .....and we laughed companionably as people of a certain age are wont to do ) and my cash was handed back . And there I was , with free reign in town to choose my own mac , no Nat to guide me .

What can I say ?

I take the new beige mac from the wardrobe later with a flourish on its lovely hanger and Nat looks it up and down . I apply it to myself , pointing out it was ( is , indeed ) a size 8 . Hmm she says , giving it the benefit of the doubt .... but already starting to shake her head and wag her finger at me .
I await the verdict .

"Mother....... "she says in mock Indian accent ( as in Indian mother speaking without reticence to young teenage daughter ) ..... "This coat is ideal if you are attending the hideous coat convention . You will certainly win . "

She advises I wear my leather jacket for our bonding pizza night ( last night ) . And again today for the literary fastival . Perhaps she is right . But I am keeping my mac , even if it means I am now looking for that coat convention . Its time I won something after all .

This afternoon I am seeing Patrick Gale ( oh the excitement !! ) , Philip Hensher , newly discovered , for me , and Janet Street Porter .

If I had more time I would have included Irma Kurtz , Libby Purves and Benjamin Zephaniah.
But I must to my porch cleaning . And reading abit more of Philip H ....
Etc .