The Dangers of Self Diagnosis

Yesterday morning saw me up and dressed by seven thirty and in Borders bookshop and drinking coffee and reading three books ( not simultaneously ) in Starbucks by ten or therabouts . My treat after a stressful week and a celebration of the no headache fact . The books were carefully chosen , one about the m word , one about thyroid problems and the third a how to live with teens book written as a joky story by a parent .

Oh the dangers of self diagnosis . I was fairly sure in my analysis that I had an underactive thyroid . It all fitted , my freezing cold hands on the hottest of days , my tendency to fall fast asleep at six pm not waking till six am if given half a chance , my hoarse voice ( ok maybe I imagined that one having read the symptom on Google ) , the headaches ( no mention of migraines but I ignored that ) . I glossed over the symtoms that didnt quite fit , as you do , the " expressionless face " ( well maybe I have that and hadn't noticed and its hardly something people will point out ) , the dry skin , the acne , the menstrual cramping , the constipation , the hair falling out ( there was a chunk in the shower drain the other day just before we went on holiday and my hair does feel quite thin ? ) the excema , the weight gain . Anyway the list goes on ....

But , there you go , when I spoke to the GP on Friday she kindly informed me that contrary to my own view , science had proved that my thyroid is working just fine and the real problem ( if you can call it that ), is that my body is doing just what it should and I am in fact menopausing as we speak .

Well , I was flabbergasted .

Having been informed by my good sister ( who is very knowledgeable on all such matters ) that I was in the perimenpause long since , at which I blew a loud dismissive raspberry , I have been apparently In Denial that I too am going to menopause like every other woman in the land who reaches a certain age . But not yet .. I say .
I have surely only just grown up last week .
That's as may be but here we are and the evidence is catalogued in the lab . My blood sample has given me away .

Having got over my shock I am now feeling quite excited . The sooner it starts in earnest the sooner it ends and along with it these migraines ? And as I have no other symptoms to speak of I should be glad , notwithstanding my rather inadequate memory and my general irritations with everyone except myself ( and including myself some days ) .

I should add that besides bringing these glad tidings the GP did make several other useful suggestions , including the news that she and her colleagues have unearthed another neurologist in the region and I am now headed in his/her direction , and we shall then seek a gynaecology opinion as to whether a hysterectomy would be of any assistance to my plight . Any advice / knowledge from readers gratefully received .

Its all a far cry from cat yodelling !