This New Year thing again

I look out of my bedroom window in my dream state at 6 am and there is my first all black cocker spaniel , Josie , sitting on the back lawn on a rug . She looks about a year old , glossy and with long healthy ears , her back to me . I can see her quite clearly but with her back turned she cannot see me . It is Summer and the sunlight is against me so I have to squint against the sun . I tell D she is there and I want to go down to see her . I set off on a long journey but on the way I am distracted by a neighbour and I never make it to her . This is ok . She seemed happy enough there and was not alone though I did not know the woman who was with her .
I wake and we have all overslept .

Felt wierd .... had I somehow escaped a near death or something ?
I pick up The Prince of Tides by Pat Conroy , presented to me by Chaela on the occasion of my recent landmark birthday . I have just started to read it but it is hard to out down . I wish I had read it before we went to the Carolinas .

My spirits were high making more paper this morning , dark reds in two shades and some pale yellow brown . Trying to work out how to thin the pulp for a lighter texture . I have an idea for some cards for two friends , one of whom left the area recently . It will include a map of the area and a heart .

My first card , made at the weekend , had arrived at its destination today , and a text arrived from J thanking me . This makes me smile . Somehow I had not thought of someone actually receiving the card .

Out of the blue the news that a colleague has died during the night , completely unexpectedly . The blood seems to drain from my fingers as I try to take in the news . A loud bang from the kitchen . Pearl has pushed the blender to the floor and there is pale coloured pulp everywhere .

I feel lucky to be alive and well and in good spirits as I make my paper and think my thoughts .

Is there something about this year ?
Are all years like this , in essence , but we forget ?