Ms CatCalls writes an e mail in French

I turn to blogging as light relief .

Saturday morning sees us up at six am , D to return the camper van to York or its environs and me to walk the dog and conduct a counselling session . ( I don't advertise this as one of my services but if asked will oblige .... and it is something I love doing ) .

I fiddle about until the appointed time , trying to get Alice out for her walk ( she is in holiday lazy greyhound mode and prefers to keep her head under the cushion ) , and I finally leave the house in a mad rush . My car is in York , and as I manage to set off the alarm system on D's car my mobile starts , and a nurse from our local hospital informs me that I am needed on one of the wards . I am confused . Moi ? The alarm is driving me mad , the car is refusing to start , the clock is ticking on so I ask her to call me back as she is making no sense ...

It transpires( after two hours of trying to trace which ward called me ) that one of my former CatCalls people has been admitted to hospital the previous night in an emergency after a fall and needs surgery . Furthermore , nightmare , she has no friends or relatives in the northeast , having lived in France for the previous x years , has has to leave her three beloved cats locked in her house and could I help , like now , as she is going into surgery imminently ?

I scan my brain for what can and can't be cancelled ... most can be postponed till tomorrow and I head up to the hospital , manage to find a parking space ( a good omen under the cirumstances )
and finally locate M flat out in a hospital gown , under the influence of morphine and expecing to go down to theatre and trying to remain cheerful despite the shock and her anxiety about her feline friends at home and whether they are safely indoors after the ambulance incident etc .

We make a list of what she needs and what the cats will want . M as ever is far more concerned for her cats but I try as diplomatically as someone as I can to point out that she will in time require "stuff " and that a hospital gown per se will not suffice once she becomes a little more mobile . We finally agree that I will bring in some underwear , toiletries etc and that a work e mail needs to be mailed asap . ( This is all quite surreal . We have only met once before , and I am advising her about the most personal of things .)

Thus it is that I find myself ferreting for pants , and then , get this , writing an e mail , business style , in French , no less , to explain why a piece of work will not be arriving from Madame on time . I can tell you , that took my mind off the court report that had been starting to occupy my mind this weekend as I gear up for the DayJob again . It also occurred to me as I typed in to Google " Translate English to French " and came up with a little square box to help me do same that a Google " Write your Court Report Software " wouldn't come amiss , for those Monday mornings when the brain just isn't in the groove yet . I guess its out there ? I'm probably just looking in the wrong place .
Anybody ?

Meanwhile , when I returned to the hospital to deliver her things and let her know cats are safe and so on , M was still in theatre . I will keep you posted . I think again of how lucky I am to be surrounded by friends and quite a few family members living nearby should I need help .
How scary to find yourself alone .

The Graveyard .

The church

The graveyard in front of the parsonage .

I wish it were possible to capture in a single shot just how many graves are packed into that graveyard , all piled up and squashed on top of each other . And its also not possible to get in a picture that the graveyard is situated right in front of the parsonage . Imagine waking up every morning and looking out onto all those graves . I know cemetaries and graves can be very peaceful and restful . Situated behind a house , and set in well cut lawns , where you can wander with flowers and sit and read , or ponder life and its vagaries , I would agree . But not this . Not this mass and pile of stone and slabs and well , death and reminders of mortality , in front of you every single day .

The Brontes themselves are buried in the church rather than here .

And yet visiting the parsonage and Haworth itself is anything but dispiriting . I would return tomorrow . Happily spend a week renting one of the cottages that overlooks the graveyard , just to see how it feels . Wierd or what ?

The Bronte Parsonage

Monkey faints as Ms CatCalls takes the Wheel and heads for Grasmere

Alice prefers me in the back seat ....

Monkey faints as I take the wheel

Its official ... we are back . Though I am still ( officially at least ) in Denial .

Despite the rain ( second half of trip ) I would have still have given my eye teeth or something to have had six weeks or maybe even six months tootling about in the camper van seeing this and that .

Alice had a preference for D driving . The monkey certainly did , and D noted that when he was behind the wheel the cool box .. well , say no more .

We started where we meant to , in Bronte country , where the sun shone and the graves and the parsonage were grim but wonderful . I recommend Haworth to all . Photographs will follow , perhaps ad nauseum , who knows .

Alice caught a rabbit as we stumped across the moors where those skinny little Brontes walked to the waterfalls , allegedly on a daily basis , but let it go on command and as she seemed to be holding it very carefully and not a drop of blood was seen , it hopped off quickly and we assumed all was well . Though our hearts were pounding and Alice was all agog and her teeth chattering much as when she sees a steak pie up ahead .

More to follow ....

Now this I find interesting ... I receive a copy of the letter from the neurologist ( about whom I was ranting last week ) to my GP , noting that I am much improved generally ( what ? ) and that May was a very good month for me though June has been unfortunately less good with three severe headaches . Three ? I sqwark , three ? I saw him write in his notes that immediately prior to my attendance I had had ten days of headaches , and that was just that bit of the month . You really aren't interested in hearing about the rest of the month ....What is going on here ?
Ah here is the reason .. he signs off that he is intending to discharge me due to my improvements blah blah . Would look a bit odd to say we do not appear able to assist this woman so are discharging her anyway . But why not , on reflection . Why not indeed ? What price honesty ? Failing does not sit easy ? Do I do this in my job ? This I need to think about .

However , I am on a bit of a high so I have no intention of letting any of that get me down . Since then I have had one or two minor setbacks but otherwise have been well .

I am officially now on holiday for several days . Despite the rain outside ( very heavy ) I cannot quite believe it will continue ) , and by Sat when we collect our hire camper van from York it will be sunshine all round and we will be exloring Bronte country and then further afield whilst Nat is on her school trip to Europe ( France Belgium Germany ). Those teachers deserve a medal .
Alice is psyching herself by sleeping at every possible opportunity , her head under the cushion .
She has particularly revelled in the practice runs on the local wine bar , and test drives of our bed ( the occasional afternoon snooze ) , and has even " done sharing " with the cats . Kitty is not amused .
Laura is moving in to take care of house and cats and has her own plans ( Mouth of the Tyne Festival this weekend ) .
PS . How do you spell sqwark ? Anybody ?

Canny dancer that Matt

If you need to smile ...YouTube - Where the Hell is Matt? (2008)