Them fleas ......

Today we are mostly waging war on them fleas.

Its years since the last plague at the Catcalls residence . I don't know how we manage to avoid them what with our central heating and the dog and four cats ( oh and those piggies too ) and our tendencies to mingle with other peoples cats and rabits , latterly .

The last infestation involved me in calling out environmental health when as I settled Nat to bed ( she was a baby at the time ) I noticed a beastie hopping up her arm and next morning she had three bites in a row. Clearly all the sprays and flea treatments I had applied to my animals ( we had a cocker spaniel and a papillon and two cats at that time , all now sadly deceased ) had had little effect .

Not that I'm a snob or anything but as I was put through to Pest Control I did ask how the Man would look when he arrived . We had just moved into the neighbourhood and I was hoping my daughter would be accepted at Mother and Toddler events in the not too distant future . You can't be too careful . I wasn't too sure of my own standing yet either , wearing the same clothes most days as I do ( its a comfort thing ) and in those days driving a Very Old Car . The man on the phone was very reassuring and knew where I was coming from instantly . The man would arrive in an unmarked car ( I had never thought about that ! Imagine a large van marked Pest Control ) . He would be dressed in ordinary clothes , and not in a white space suit as I had envisaged . Ah ! Its not like the Fumigations I had witnessed in my days observing social services' finest hours then ? I breathed again . In fact the "man who did" was in and out in five minutes flat , the only evidence of his vocation a sort of oil can I secretly coveted , which he directed at the edges of the rooms and blew a kind of powder at , exhorting me not to vacuum for forty eight hours . Now that was tricky ... with two longish haired dogs and a baby that trailed " stuff " from one end of the house to the other .

Ah , fond memories , but so far it has not come to that .
This time round , almost fifteen years later , I have two bites and D has around sixteen . Fair to say he is juicier and more susceptible than me . ( I should add at this stage , not that I'm boasting or anything , but I have lost almost a stone in weight thanks to the low carb diet , thus I would be less juicy , in some respects ? Though not all , one hopes . )
I think fleas , likes all of us , have their likes and dislikes .

So , this morning , we spent almost fifty pounds ( $100 ) on flea treatments , also suitable for biting lice , and applied to Alice ( no problem ) , Kitty ( not suited ) , Toby ( much wriggling ) , Pearl ( not located , later after much banging and crashing found locked in my wardrobe , after I was trying on old clothes long forgotten as Too Small , now Too Large . Oh Well , time to Buy More , possibly ? ) . Jessie , at time of writing , still not located . She crawls to back of space behind water bed .

I depart thereafter for town , D then settles to work , upon my return , D informs me he has had to bag all his clothes and towel and have extremely hot shower as has been re bitten twice .

Ah well .

Its a process .

Fumigation and Pest Control here we come ?

The disappearing rabbits .....

... now you see them now you don't ....

Tonight one very stressed cat and rabbitcaller .
Arrived at first call of the day nice and early , funny how my instincts tell me things ; for the first time this summer ( rain rain rain ) rejecting my boots and socks for bare feet and flip flip type footwear and cut off trousers ( why ? dont ask ? ) , breezed in , said hello to Molly the cat who croaked her usual hello and flicked and whisked her tail at me with her usual urgency and led me through the house and into the garden . Glancing out of the window into the garden , again something I have never done before , horrors ! complete absence of bunnies in the posh rabbit residence . Door swinging open ... How did they do that ? And more to the point , where were they ?

Hands shaking and heart pounding I dropped the keys several times before I opened the doors out to the back and Bliss ... there was black bunny but .... no sign of pale bunny .... black bunny thoroughly wet and came towards me . I ran back indoors for the pear I had brought with me and she came toward me for a piece , hopping off when she realised I had designs on curtailing her fun . Suffice to say we tussled , I won , but I bear the scars ....

Checking every inch of the garden I fast realised Ms Bun was not there . The thickets were quiet and the vegetable patches bare . No white bunny in sight . I stood with my hand on my heart thinking of the family in France and their bunny ... nowhere .

I returned to the hutch to see how this had come about . The little heart shaped catch had been popped right off , presumably by the sheer force of the rabbits bashing against it in a determined effort to make off . Wood was chewed everywhere . The beautiful Dutch style residence , delightful to look at , was no match for the Houdini bunnies I was charged with .
Meanwhile , the garden was silent . Molly the cat picked her way across the lawn balefully and stared at me with a well , thats torn it , look on her face . Now what ?

Back into the house Molly I said , lets see what we can see from upstairs .
And , from the upstairs bedroom window , who should we spy in the next door ( pristine landscaping ) garden , but Ms Bun , hopping gently .
I raced down , two at a time , thinking to myself Keys Ms CatCalls Keys , dont lock yourself out at this stage of the game , and there I am , ringing next door's bell at some unearthly hour , glancing at my watch as she emerges in her robe at eight am , her house alarm bleeping and signifying her early wrench from a warm bed .
She allows me access to her garden but is not convinced by my tale , especially when Ms Bun is , of course , nowhere to be seen .
" I do have a white cat " she says , helpfully .
I want to cry , fearing that the bunny is by now in the next garden and then the next and then , horrors onto the main road at the end .
I want to sit down on the manicured lawn and sob .
" I see your cat " I say firmly poiting to a pale tortoiseshell puss lurking near the water feature , " But this was the rabbit from next door .
I waffle my face and make whiskery gestures . It was the rabbit I am looking after .
But it is not here now . I will go back and hope it has gone left rather than right . But first I will give you my number in case it re appears .

I hurry back to my house and through to the back . Molly tries to go out the front . No Molly I say firmly . I need you out here with me . I need all the help I can get .
We return together and oh Bliss oh Joy , there is Pale Bunny back on our lawn hopping happily .
I fetch pear and bunny takes a tiny piece and then runs hell for leather .....

Readers , I kid you not .
45 minutes later ( yes 45 ), Bunny is back in the hutch .
I have more scratches .
Black bunny is happy .
Pale bunny is puffing .
I am puffing .
Molly is washing her face .
The neighbour is peering at is from her bedroom window and I am trying to devise a way to make the hutch safe and contain these rabbits for the next 24 hours .

NB Those of you with fancy rabbit hutches beware . All is not as they seem .

A few glasses of wine and a ride in a taxi ....

You have to hand it to Nigella .... none of this fiddling around with low carb this and half fat that as she clambers out of the nice solid black cab after what passes for a night on the hoy Chez Lawson ( or insert whatever other name she goes by when not cooking up a storm in that faux kitchen of hers with the glam fairy lights still up long after Christmas, and that we do have in common , my feathery Paperchase lights being in residence until the cat finally picked them all bald and brought the mirror down with them one sultry June day ) .

My plans for a spot of blackberry picking across the fields at Backworth thwarted as the evening crept on , the light fading and the dog's head disappearing ever deeper into the cushion . It seemed pointless to push . The entire household was wiped out , apparently , by a picnic at Tyne Green , Hexham , food purchased at Brockbushes coffee shop ( who would not permit us to eat at an outside table even with dog in tow , pah ! ) . Admittedly I missed the highlight of the afternoon , a slow walk up a steep hill with a three year old insisting on leading the dog , and eating ice cream at the same time , as I was taking five ( or was it fifteen ? ) on the bookshop tracking down the latest Kate Morton novel and watching with an air of detachment as three others dropped into my bag .

Instead I sank into my seat and there was Nigella Expressing it for England .... producing her mustard chops and at the end of her endeavours eating 2 , all to herself .... curled up on the sofa . And this is where we differ . Finding myself alone , I would eat a piece of cheese and a ryevita and so I believe would the majority of women , whilst men would crack open a pizza , congratulating themselves on having learned to cook as they open the box and stick on the oven .
If I were to cook the chops , and cooked two , it would be one for tonight and one for tomorrow . I may well eat them both , but by that one first , then staring longingly at the second then eating it later , slightly cold .

And I was just so filled with admiration for the foxy lady as she piled home in the cab plotting her supper of caramel croissant pudding . Out of the fridge came the milk, the cream , the eggs , all slung over the bashed up croissant pleasantly stale but not before she produced the most outrageously calorific and carb laden caramel without so much as a reference to guilt , fat , her hips , a*se, or any other part of her anatomy . How does she do it ? Put any other woman I know in a room with such ingredients and she will mix them together , ( particularly late at night after a few glasses of wine and a ride in a taxi ) , usually with her friends , and she will bake them and relish them and enjoy them more than life itself . But the experience will be tinged with guilt , thoughts of the need to atone in the morning , next week . The debates may go full circle , the enjoyment will be no less .
But Nigella really appears to have no truck with such nonsense. I wish I could do it .

Now we have a loft room again

Look we did finish it .... we now have a room with discrete sections and where it will be possible to lie in bed looking out onto a relaxation area rather than imagining you have landed at Grand Central Station and can chose one of fifteen pieces of luggage in a variety of colourways ranging from sparkling pink with silver flashes to lime green . Admittedly the fan is less likely to be used than the radiators as the weather is going at the minute . August ? I dont think so ?

Bliss for me to have two weeks off from the Day Job though . I'm revelling in the routine of the CatCalling , which is at an all time high this month .

Although not quite out of bed at six am I'm usually propped up reading and as my bedside light goes on Kitty spots it from the bathroom and takes a flying leap and lands on my chest . Thus begins the day . The dog no longer gets me up ( or rarely , and if so its to adjust her blanket . She is in teenager mode ) and is into Pyjama Days mode , occasionally not surfacing until well after the rest of us are having lunch , slowly stretching and with a sheepish look on her face " where did the day go ? ".

The Cats all have their foibles . There are fewer weekenders are more long stretches . More " Im getting bored now ..... what can I do to let you know ? " There have been the upturned washing up bowls ( how does a cat manage to upsend a washing up bowl carefully turned the wrong way up for obvious reasons? ) full of unmentionable substances ... well not that unmentionable , it could have been worse ..... the cat who got on the wrong side of the gate ( I suspect the postie ) and declined to jump back but sat crying in the rain till my arrival , hopefully not for too long , the house with a strong smell of gas ( who turned that tap on , it wasn't me ? ) the cats who perpetually "miss" the litter tray and then walk about in ..... say no more ... where is that brush to clean their fur , where is the disinfectant . And then , oh the joy when this little cat who was keeping a distance suddenly wants to be picked up and cuddled and starts to purr ......

And now , the biggest danger of all ... having this new relaxation area upstairs ..... I go up to vacuum and find myself sitting to "check the ambience" before my friend arrives for the long weekend and before you know it a magazine flies into my hand and an hour has passed and the menus are not planned and the gas board are still not rung and ..... but I can confirm the ambience is most fine ....

Clutter Clearing

Soon this will loook like a room .

Vital Statistics

Its a long long time since I checked my stats .

Mainly due to the fact that I know who is commenting and about what and I assume that others read and lurk as I do on several blogs and forums .

My blogging has fallen off of late mainly due to an increase in the overall pace of life , in CatCalling ( and now of course RabbitCalling , is this the face of the future and will GuineaPigCalling be the next development ) . I have less time generally to ponder life's mysteries and when I do I muse and text and e mail about them more than I blog . Photography is less of an option in the constant rain ? Or is that just an excuse ? We have had some amazing weather too . Much of that has seen me flat out with migraine . I'm keeping my fingers crossed on that score too ( Migraine Defense trial continues ....Food Intolerance test not yet officially underway , though blood gone off to the lab as first stage of the research trial )

I digress.....
Early this morning I checked my stats and realised that the blog had a very high number of hits ( surprise ) already this morning , then , interesting , they were all from one person . I started to get curious about this and clicked about a bit and finally realised that someone had been reading a host of back posts for what seemed like several hours , apparently in the early hours of this morning . For some reason I found this touching . And also a little baffling . And , as they say , curiouser and curiouser . Imagining a real live person reading backwards through my blog , finding in there something to keep them looking or reading . I started to read the blogs myself , retracing the steps , re reading posts I had written , of which I had no memory whatsoever , yet this is my life . (I did this for about five minutes , then life beckoned) .
Cats to feed , rabbits , guineapigs , birds , fish , a room to clear , and wouldnt it be good to read the Sunday papers .
But somewhere in there I found time to read some of my favourite blogs .
Funny old world .

My First RabbitCall... and does the Blackberry do Raspberries ?

Yesterday I was swimming up and down my own little Roman style pool in Grasmere in the Lake District eyeing up the mist hanging over the mountain and revelling in the hotel breakfast to come ( cooked breakfast is so low carb ). Today I am pondering the Blackberry and wondering for the first time a) how these things work and b) why do people call them the Crackberry ?
I have numerous CatCalls this weekend but this is my first RabbitCall and despite clear instructions that the rabbits , who are exquisite creatures in a large Dutch bungalow residence situated outdoors but with attendant outhouses containing all their requirements , foodstuffs , hay , straw , sawdust , shavings , must be spoken to and stroked to maintain their socialisation , they also need brushing and their nether regions checking for this and that , I can find no hairbrush and am thus unable to brush out their fur .
I re read my e mail instructions and decide an e mail is in order . The family will then receive it by means of a Blackberry. I recall my brother having such a system and though we mocked and cavorted round the said item , I paid no attention to it . Is the Blackberry a phone and thus switched on at will , or at all times ? Does it emit strange noises ( raspberrries perhaps ? ) and will the family be informed of the lost hairbrush via a bleep in the middle of a wedding ceremony or a christening service ? Who knows ?
Will the Blackberry reply to me telling me it cannot be held responsible for the lost brush ?
Meanwhile I must get back to my own clearing out .
The bathroom , which has taken most of our attention in the last two weeks has now been painted in Natural Hessian and though we are still waiting for the Intense Truffle to be restocked at B and Q so that the roll top bath can be re painted ( gone is the duck egg blue which has been in situ since 2000) . On my return from Grasmere ( with Nat ) D had dug out that gross black mouldy shower grout . What a hero . Even the shower now looks wonderful .
The loft rooms are now waiting to be cleared .......say no more ....... the weekend will flash past in a dust filled haze as we crawl into the loft space under the eaves . There will be much banging of the heads and cursing .I am on holiday now for two weeks and have a friend coming to stay so we need to create space so that she does not feel she is sleeping in the left luggage dept of grand central station .