Alice contemplates a duck .....

... in the background at the sailing club

The List

For years I have quietly mocked the list makers and the planners . My sister and D always have to have a plan in their heads of how the day will pan out whereas I like to wait and see , play it by ear and take what comes . I especially loved to titter when my sister took her small bag out of her larger bag and from that produced a list ... ah the list !
Exhaustion last night however got the better of me and as I sat in bed at midnight trying to collect my thoughts I found myself playing the horrifying what if ? game . What if , for the sake of argument , I forgot to feed one of my cats at the appointed time purely because I was out of synch having been away all day .
Hence this morning's list , started at three minutes past midnight and assisted by Kitty , read thus
Dog Walk
Soft Play
Books
CatCall ( all fairly pedestrian and largely unforgettable as they are the stuff of my everyday weekend life )
PlayMobil-Kate Muir
Andy Merrifield The Wisdom of Donkeys
Collect Nat
Turkish Delight .

You can see where it all starts to go downhill but I must confess I found the list comforting as the day wore on ( until I misplaced it in the dogwalking coat pocket with disastrous consequences as it had completely replaced the memory which I now regard as a thing of the past , so was the key to the address from where I needed to collect Nat who was taking us to the soft play with D's grand daughter .......)

Playmobil? Kate Muir? What on earth is this ? And Donkeys ?
These two list items hark back to my pre breakfast still in bed early morning reading of the papers and things I found of interest and therefore added to the list . Usually ( in real life, and thus with no memory ) I read something and broadly speaking within minutes it is gone , nothing left but a glimmer of happiness left where perhaps a donkey passed by , or a Playmobil piece , as was the case this morning . But having the list meant I could revisit my morning's doings at various points during the day , as I reminded myself of my various tasks . Interestingly I had and would have had no difficulty remembering to do my CatCall , a new venture with three delightful Siamese cats ( one oriental ) , one of which a petite kitten who loves to be picked up and cuddled and immediately purrs gratifyingly .

The donkey article notes a forthcoming book of the forsake the rat race and go on a pilgrimage with a donkey persuasion and has much to recommend it The Wisdom of Donkeys - Times Online and as for Kate Muir , what can I say , its now a full 14 hours later but I can still remember laughing out loud though if I had to describe in detail what about I would be hard pressed .I 'll leave it to you to click the link .The dark ages - Times Online

St Paul's Cathedral

Details to follow . We walked by St Paul's on our way to the Tate , where I wanted to see the art of the three men who dress as ladies in their spare time , ( as I called it, needing a shorthand way to nail it , my memory being so hit and miss these days ) otherwise the exhibition linking the work of Man Ray , Picabia and Duchamps .Adrian Searle on Duchamp, Man Ray, Picabia at Tate Modern Art & Architecture Tate Modern Current Exhibitions Duchamp, Man Ray, PicabiaDuchamp, Man Ray, Picabia, Tate Modern, London - Reviews, Art & Architecture -
Photographed just before the rain , which arrived as we settled relieved in the members' gallery .
Food and coffee and a view is always necessary before the exhaustion of the art .

My favourite moment was probably spotting a very elderly lady carrying a shooting stick reminiscent of that my Grandma used to take with her to the Hexham Races , and Deb and I exchanging envious glances over her head .
And then an even older stooped man very smartly but casually attired peering at the "dust growing in the corner of a glass " or some such , with his brand new iphone dangling on a string round his neck . He must have been in his nineties .

Part of the charm of seeing art for me is the consideration of how this is achieved . People vary so much . I prefer to be alone whilst wandering though is it useful and fun to have someone to compare notes with and have a giggle with at intervals . Galleries are the funniest of places I reckon . Anyone following mine and Deb's progress would have been forgiven for wanting to give us a kick up the backside half way round ... having looked forwards to this trip for weeks we then spent a good two hours in the coffee and lunch areas ( for both of us food being half the battle ) , and many of our comments being of the " God I feel quite dizzy " and " This space is enormous .... kills your feet ... " variety , interspersed to be fair with some knowledgeable asides ( mainly Debbie , who is herself an artist ) and one or two opinions " Aren't these paintings simply vile " ( mainly in the vicinity of the eroticism room ).

My favourite was of a geometry book hung out on a balcony by way of an experiment . Of course this was one of the works of which it was impossible to buy a postcard . Too quirky I guess .

Once we were done with the three men , I was confident that I was done full stop , ( having frequently before made the mistake of trying to see too much on one day and causing sensory overload and a delightful migraine to travel home on ) but spurred on by water and a reviving chat with a Greek engineer whose children were studying in London and who was fascinated , (as are most Europeans ) by a previous encounter with Girls from Newcastle upon Tyne wearing very few clothes in the Bigg Market on a Saturday night , was able to glance briefly into the exhibition on the third level and to discover the most sublime painting of a woman with a cello by an artist whose name I have now forgotten though the Christian name was almost certainly Meredith .
I'd still given a choice have rather had a postcard of that geometry book though . Maybe I can do my own though ... if you see an odd looking book dangling out of a bedroom window and intereacting with the elements , say no more .

Trip to London coming up tomorrow to see some Art .
Thoughts tonight of Rachel and Tim and Fred ( whose first anniversary will come by tomorrow ). Fred We Love You Freddie
Also remembering Madeleine McCann missing for almost one year .

Hard to write at the minute, at least hard to write and put it out there . I never find it hard to write , in fact you may have noticed I find it hard to curb myself and were it not for these " how to succeed at blogging " blogs full of handy hints and tips ( hint one never blog more than once a day ) , I would most likely be at it thrice daily least ways when not at the Day Job when mostly the brain hurts too much for anything except being led by the nose by the greyhound cats and daughter , in that order upon my return to home and hearth .

Its the age old problem of what can appear on a blog and what can't . So many of the things I would love to write about are work related ... and those that aren't would impact on other people . Maybe I need another , anonymous writing space , but I would in time get mixed up . Suffice to say these last weeks and the last couple of days have involved some heavy conversations about problem drinking and how it affects kids , mental health and what that means , what migraine medication has done to my life and my memory ( my day seems to start at five am and ends effectively at 10pm and my memory is a thing of the past ... memory ? what memory ? ) I discovered via a rumour that one of my friends is moving out of the area , couldn't quite believe that she is really moving , didn't want to believe it and now have to start facing it as I received a text from her to say their house is up for sale and its happening .

But there has been some good news . ( Those with a weak stomach or the highly sensitive may wish to skip the next paragraph in its entirety ) The camper van is booked for a week in July , starting in York so I have at least a vague plan to spend the first night in Bronte country ( Haworth ) which I've visited before though I don't think D has . His son( early twenties, shares his father's interest in so called performance cars ) is appalled that his dad would even contemplate driving such a vehicle ( completely uncool ) and tried hard to dissuade him from making the booking . The best part about this was hearing D describe Alice to the van hire people as a " little " greyhound and very well behaved ( ahem ) , noting that she sleeps 23 and a half hours per day ( largely true ) . He didn't mention the ongoing tussle between Alice and the various human members of the household for Leader of the Pack or Top Dog status ( which deserves a post of its own ) , including the latest " I have a long grass stalk sticking out of my bottom which I can't expel and you will have to help me D " look ( presenting said rear end complete with protruding flag ) , to which I respond by walking off telling her to "deal with it, Alice other dogs manage " , whereas D in long suffering manner assists with baby wipe and poo bag .
My sister had long advised me about Top Dog status in her own establishment , her border terrier cross jack russel dog Grommit fully recognising her husband as the highest ranking family member , with the eldest boy George second and Harvey the little lad next . The elder daughter mostly away at uni( and female anyway ) didn't count and my sister despite feeding Grommit every meal he had ever eaten , petting him and generally cleaning up after him and attending to his every whim was Bottom of the Pecking Order . Imagine how that went down .
I asked how she knew this . She provided a demonstration one Sunday when we went for afternoon tea . In the farmhouse kitchen is a large low coffee table just above Grommit -height .
I was instructed to take a note ( either a ten or a five pound ) from my handbag and place it somewhere on the coffee table then just keep an eye on it as we talked . I did this and as I watched Grommit sidled over to the table , slid his head across the table after a few minutes , when our attention had been dsitracted and slowly took the note in his mouth and slid it towards himself . Once he pulled it off onto the floor without being stopped he scopped it up carefully , trotted over to my sister's husband and quietly gave him the money . We were amazed at this ... apparently if Peter was not at home , the money , or any other choice morsel or treat the dog saw as fitting , would be given next to George and finally Harvey would be offered the gift . Nothing for Laura . Bottom of the pile .

As I say this subject warrants a post of its own .
But finally a joke from Peter .
Question from Laura .... mentioning some friends acquiring a shi-tsu crossed with a Jack Russell , asked " what would you call that ?
Peter, (quick as a flash ) : "A Jack Shit " .

Capybaras

Lest any of you are in attendance at the blog for the guinea pig content I should let you know that I am reliably informed that the big guinea pigs that Nigel was waxing lyrical about the other night when I was trying to sloth in front of the tv are in fact likely to be capybara ( plural or singular I cannot say , though I am sure a comment will appear in due course ) . Large brown beasties with snub noses which can be viewed in real life ( for the UK residents ) at TrottersTrotters World of Animals : animal park in the lake district, animals, keswick near Keswick in Cumbria ( one of those viewing farm establishments so beloved of families with toddlers and small children myself included though my child has long outgrown that stage and I am now forced to acknowedge we attend for me ) . They reside in close proximity to the tapirs , another strong favourite of mine . ( Previous encounters with Topamax have led to my impersonating and indeed believing myself to be a tapir on occasion but that's another story CatCalls: The Tapir).
My sister is a veritable mine of information . Would you recall the name capybara ? I wouldnt . This I know for sure . Tapir now .....

Two and a half days of migraine... without a break except when under the blissful effects of Immigran , Volterol , sleep and the waterbed .